How dare you steal my chicken?
Steal my chicken? I'll eat you instead!
Chicken, chicken.
In my honor,
those who sold their bodies were called
"Chickens."
Chickens flourished through the ages.
They reached their pinnacle during the Tang Dynasty.
In the capital Chang'an, today's Xi'an,
"academies" or brothels were considered
respectable businesses.
Master.
Delicate jade, scented dream.
Jade, flower and flute
but not gold.
Short flute, piercing sound, plays forever.
Good day, master.
Sister, on second thought…
Half my life lost with the river.
Play the flute, blossoms wither.
My mother is calling. Excuse me.
You're stingy with love!
Ah, master doesn't wish to haggle.
Nine-tenths, then?
Finish yourself just before the nine yard mark,
yes or no?
You don't get it? Let's replay using NICAM.
It's written right here.
The price includes sucking, licking and blowing.
Why the extra charges?
Your dick is tiny, it'll take me forever.
Pay up or better luck next time.
Can I pay less just for a regular blowjob?
You're one cheap customer.
Just a blowjob? You wasted my time.
Some other time.
The madam is calling me.
I was just kidding.
Do I look like a cheapskate?
How about a 10% discount?
How about I do 90% of the job
and you finish yourself off? Deal?
Deal!
When China entered the Republican era,
polygamy was outlawed.
But how can a man be faithful to just one woman for life?
So, men left their wives at home
and visited brothels every day.
Is that you, Master Ip?
It's been so long since your last visit.
Miss, this isn't my sort of thing.
But you're famous for banging ten at a time!
Ma'am, I can "fight" ten at a time.
Fight or bang, whatever.
I have the right opponents for you.
Granny, respect yourself!
Drop the facade. You always visit the Gold Pavilion!
It was in the movie!
The Grandmaster visits brothels,
Ip Man is a faithful husband.
It'll take forever to boil water by burning $10 notes.
Use $100 or $500 notes.
In 1932, the government of British Hong Kong issued a ban
on prostitution.
Governor Peel ordered all western prostitutes
to stop working on June 30th, three years ago.
But you girls are native…
You think you don't need to worry?
Due to your massive numbers,
the government has given you three years to switch careers?
No, no.
That means, effective June 30th, 1935,
all brothels in Shek Tong Tsui will
shut down for good.
What's today's date?
June 30th.
What time is it?
11:55 p.m.
Burn it all.
Yes.
This will be our last, burn it.
Thirteenth Master.
Revlon!
That was the end of prostitution in HK… Get real!
Wherever there are men, there are prostitutes.
Afterwards, HK entered the "nightclub era."
For more about Hong Kong's nightclub era,
please watch Golden Chicken 1 and 2 again.
Now that the HK nightclub scene is over,
how do people order chickens?
NOVEMBER 17TH, SUNDAY, 9:52 A.M.
SECRETARY MINI
I HAVE A NEW CONTRACT FOR YOU. WHEN DO YOU WANT TO SEE IT?
Just leave if it's urgent.
Dr. Tin, your phone's been ringing non-stop.
MOTHER
Can't you see I'm operating?
As a responsible doctor,
I never answer calls during surgery.
-I'll be quick. -No calls.
Go on, get out.
Apply pressure here.
Today, all you need is a cell phone to order chicken.
It's also all a chicken needs to get customers.
Mr. Chan, Ms. Kim can be at the meeting in half an hour.
Please confirm, and I'll book the meeting room.
Mr. Chan, Ms. Kim can be at the meeting in half an hour.
Please confirm, and I'll book the meeting room.
Well…
Honey!
My name is Kam. I'm not a secretary, or a mother,
but a "madam."
"MOMMY" OR "MAMASAN" IN JAPANESE - MEANS PIMP, MADAM, PROSTITUTES AGENT
Kammy, where were you?
Fourth Uncle is waiting at the Four Seasons, Room 404.
Yes! More work!
I'll soon buy you all.
Momo dear, go to Room 705 now, 705 is waiting.
He's bald. Tell him he has lots of hair.
Just a few more steps. It's the same old 403.
Hello.
Mom?
I'm coming for dinner.
Please ask Third Aunt to go easy on the MSG.
She uses too much every time, but you know me,
I'm afraid of artificial stuff, that's right.
I've arrived. His name is Chan?
Yes, serve him well.
No excuses.
I need the meeting materials to arrive in two minutes!
I'm with the client now!
WIFE
YOU SENT ME BY ERROR THE MESSAGE TO YOUR SECRETARY. RELAX. TAKE IT SLOW.
I know, I'll relax
and take it slow.
I said no big boobs. Big boobs are fake!
It's like this every time!
Boss, it's a misunderstanding.
I use padding to create the illusion. Look!
It's flat.
Now this is an airport runway, which means "real boobs."
-Thank you! -You're welcome.
Clients rarely like flat-chested girls like you do.
That's why, for the sake of your future career development,
I suggest that you enlarge your boobs.
-Really? -I can help you in this regard.
Visit me sometime.
MAYANG PLASTIC SURGERY CENTER DR. TIN CHUN, PLASTIC SURGEON
You grew up sleeping on your stomach?
How did you know?
My mom made me do the same.
Really?
Madams used to only present chicks to customers. But now…
Chief Chen, your 10 cases of Dom Perignon 2003 have arrived.
I'll have them delivered today.
We offer a variety of services.
Madams take care of all clients' needs.
Good morning, Chairman Chu. It's Kam calling.
I just found the bag that Mrs. Chu had her eyes on.
Would you like to buy one to make her happy?
How much?
It's a steal, Chairman Chu.
Seven hundred ninety thousand.
All right! Thank you!
Hello.
Sleep-Ping.
What number are you?
-Thirty-three. -Thirty-three.
PICK UP APPLICATION FORM PLEASE WAIT IN LINE
Chief Fung, I saved you a spot in line
for your son's dream kindergarten!
Number 33.
So are you coming to Chief Chen's party tonight?
Each day after 2:00 p.m.,
I must wake up all the girls.
If I fail, I'll hang myself.
Mona, Mona! Wake up!
You're always late! What time is it?
Get up now!
I'll get you 25% off the Prada bag.
Come quickly, I'll take you there.
The busiest time of day for a madam is after 4:00 p.m.
You have to be ruthless to compete for customers.
Jimmy, will we see you tonight?
Really? La Madame saved two girls for you?
How can you believe anything that liar says?
She borrows girls from me.
You're guaranteed two good ones tonight.
If not, come back to me!
Fix your makeup, hike up your skirt.
After you grab the clients, you grab the girls.
Including the floating population, Hong Kong has close to four million women.
Twenty thousands are prostitutes.
It's a 100% increase in ten years.
Meanwhile, the number of johns has multiplied by three fold.
That means grabbing girls is harder than grabbing clients.
Fai, what're you doing?
Shooting.
Got any girls?
Plenty!
But we're shooting A Simple Life.
I'll even take Ann Hui!
Where are you going now?
We promised La Madame first.
I need to keep my word.
Okay, hold on!
Hi, La Ma'.
I'm sorry, I didn't know you booked Mona and Liza.
I'm short on players before half-time. Consider it a loan,
I'll release them by midnight.
I learned something new recently,
even in our profession,
we must still respect elders.
It gets harder to do your work as you age.
Don't trouble yourself next time
to call about something so trivial.
Mona and Liza, you keep them.
La Ma', you have a big heart!
Let's be friends in the next life!
Our generation doesn't say such things anymore.
Thank you very much!
Relax. It's just work.
"Fly out" the hair… You make it more… curly… curly.
Madam Kam!
-Afa! -Son of a…
What?
I slipped on the wet floor!
Are your boobs okay?
I'd sue the mall for millions if your boobs were damaged!
You seem fine.
Go change now. It's past 7:00 p.m.!
Come, girls, get to work! Thank you!
Quick!
Candy, Mona, Liza, Afa and Mike,
You're up first. Move! It's past 7:00.
He wants to break up with me.
What a jerk! Can't he wait till after work?
Now we're one short!
Who's ready to go?
I'm ready!
A Disney girl?
What's your name?
I am Woo Loo.
Woo Loo or voodoo? Whatever.
Grab your bag. Let's go.
Hello, bosses!
How do you do? I'm Kam, Kam, Kam.
It's an evening of wine and fine ladies. You'll be satisfied by both.
Good evening, bosses.
Bosses, here's the first course.
Alaska hairy king crab
paired with Hokkaido milk pudding.
Mona and Liza!
Bosses, let me introduce two beauties.
Wow, so tight here. What a thrill!
She's Afa.
Boss.
Guess what color I'm wearing.
I don't know.
It's pink.
Boss, I haven't been introduced yet.
I'm Woo Loo.
They say rocking is bad for your back and your fortune.
But you won't be happy if you don't rock.
So, pick me! I'll be your ultimate fantasy.
You're guaranteed multiple orgasms.
I… do it all.
Aerial stunts, the upside-down positions,
even the dragon-boat trick!
Maybe for the next round?
Boss!
I also have a secret family skill.
Great! You can shave ice for us!
I guarantee you can't get enough.
Shave the boss. Shave him clean!
I'll shave anything. Just pay me more.
The toughest part of being a madam is not getting clients,
but maximizing the volume of clients each night.
Time management is the key.
All the girls here tonight are well-trained.
They know in order to serve more than one client a night,
they need to quickly finish off the first one before 12:30 p.m.
Then there're more to come.
Finish them off quickly!
Madam Kam.
I'm done.
She must still be shaving ice.
"Just pay me more."
We're here! Hurry!
What took you so long?
What took so long?
I brought you snacks! Have some!
Watch my dress!
It's a crime to waste food.
-Have some. -I'm allergic to seafood.
It stinks!
Have a little.
-We're going on a boat ride. -Eat.
Thanks, but I took seasickness pills.
Oh, my God! A stretch limousine!
BMW 7 Series.
Mercedes AMG C61
Ah, the latest Rolls-Royce Phantom.
I see we have a car expert here.
As they say, better to cry in a BMW
than to laugh on a bicycle.
What car do you want to ride in?
Any car, as long as you pay me.
A hearse?
I'm sorry.
Amitabha.
Depends on the price.
There's nothing wrong with selling your body.
But the price must be right in order to honor your body
and your soul.
Let's go!
Ready?
La Ma', how are you?
Hi, Madam Kam.
I'm returning Mona and Liza to you. Thank you so much!
No need.
You keep them.
I'm getting married.
Congratulations!
After all, I'm not getting any younger.
If I can't get hitched at this age, I'd be a real loser, right?
Come see my husband. Isn't he cute?
He's from Shaanxi.
Very honest looking!
Good for you.
What about you? You said you'd quit once you made enough.
When will that be?
I do want to quit, I'm leaving right now.
Let's go to Chief Chen's beach party.
Sun's up! Get up!
What?
Get to work!
-It's beautiful! -What is?
The sun! Damn it!
Don't you think?
The sunrise is stunning.
I'm really sleepy.
Pick up the gong and drum Sing a song with them
Stop!
I didn't hire you to sing!
It's a party, don't just stand around.
Strip and swim!
Hurry!
No.
Go ahead without me.
Pull your neckline down.
Lower.
How can I shoot if you wear so much clothes?
Strip!
More seductive.
Turn around.
Look at me, look.
You don't even have boobs!
Loser.
Hey, you!
That's extra!
You! Yes, you! Run to me!
How did it go?
Show me.
Good boobs, good attitude!
-But the photos aren't good. -What?
Again?
-Sure. -Run!
Relax, I'm almost done, okay?
Do I know you?
My last name is Shu.
My full name is…
Shu Fok.
Let's get comfortable!
-Let's do one more. -Okay.
-This is awesome! -Relax.
Okay.
Shiatsu King! That masseur… What's his name?
Shu Fok! He stole two Hermès bags from me!
Pardon? I didn't book a masseur?
How much are those bags worth?
Hundred fifty grand each.
I lost 300 grand?
Hire some smart guy to find that bastard!
Like Ekin Cheng?
What about him?
I saw him at a concert. He's the only smart guy I know.
Davie Bro, it's me, Kam, Boobie Kam!
You sound hoarse. Do you have a cold?
Esophageal cancer? Don't talk!
Get some rest. Goodbye.
Bah Bro, it's Boobie Kam calling.
How are you?
You're his son?
Bah Bro passed away a few years ago?
GORDON BRO
JACKIE BOY
Hallelujah!
Hello, Kam.
Thank you so much, Jackie Boy!
Sorry I haven't kept in touch. Now I'm asking for help.
All the smart guys I know are gone except you.
There are no smart guys anymore, but lots of Golden brothers.
You should thank hkgolden.com.
After I posted your story on their forum,
the brothers caught the thief within an hour.
He's a gigolo.
Is he?
Be careful when you play.
-I wasn't playing. Well, thanks again. -You're welcome.
I owe you one.
Just save the good stuff for me.
How about a foursome?
Your birthday is next month!
You still remember?
Gordon will be out of prison that day.
Should I pick him up?
Sounds like a plan.
If I'm sober, I'll be there.
You're awesome.
Mr. Auyeung.
Madam Kam!
Sit down, Madam Kam.
All right.
Did they serve you well, Mr. Auyeung?
Are you satisfied?
Ahh… No.
No? Did you all slack off?
I never slack off when it comes to money.
No, it has nothing to do with her.
I was talking about my Snowy-baby.
Snowy-baby has suffered a lot.
Why does life treat my Snowy-baby so badly?
She's been my mistress for years, never asked for anything.
She just wanted good food.
If you eat too much, you naturally get fat, right?
That's right.
She went on a diet for me.
That's nice.
She lost 40 pounds!
Amazing!
She dropped down to 250 pounds!
So skinny.
Then she was diagnosed with an incurable disease.
Huntington's Disease.
Don't cry. Let's have a foursome?
You all need to pamper me.
Of course.
Make it an eightsome, okay?
But Snowy has one unfulfilled wish.
What?
We have lived as man and wife. I'm satisfied.
I just have one last wish.
Just say it, I'll make it come true.
Before I die, I want to have a taste of my idol,
Louis Koo.
Mrs. Auyeung's taste is better than yours!
Louis Koo is just a small-time actor.
I called his manager for a quote.
What's his price?
I asked him the price for a quickie, and the price for a night.
So how much?
Son of a bitch. He said he was fully booked!
He couldn't even spare an hour?
"I'll pay any price, just name it!"
So, how much did he want?
How much?
He said,
"Call us again and we'll call the police."
He's a spray-tanned B-list actor.
My Snowy is afraid of the dark.
I don't understand why she wanted him.
I want him, too.
Me, too.
But I really want to fulfil her last wish.
Yeah.
Why are you staring at me?
You think I can find a Louis Koo for you?
Yes, you can.
A friend of mine owns a nightclub in Bumfuk, China.
He has a stable of celebrity look-alikes.
One is a dead ringer for Louis Koo!
Are you sure?
It's true!
My Snowy is gravely ill. She can't think straight.
We just need to find a 60% look-alike for her.
We can fulfill her wish while she's in a daze.
The Koo look-alike is arriving tomorrow.
Check him out, make sure he looks the part, okay?
I'm at the Golden Bauhinia Square.
Where are you?
BUMFUK GARDEN INTERNATIONAL ENTERTAINMENT CITY
Hey, over here! Come over!
Hi.
You must be Madam Kam.
Yes, you must be Louis Koo.
Just Bumfuk Louis Koo.
Let's get in the car?
Say, you have big chest.
So do you.
After you, Kam.
Careful.
First of all, thanks for inviting me.
I've sung in nightclubs for over 20 years.
This is my first gig overseas.
-Is that so? -Yes.
Is this your first time visiting Hong Kong?
I've visited several times, but not dressed like this.
Not many people took notice of me.
Kam, have you ever experienced Bumfuk?
I rarely go that far.
Bumfuk is fun! Come over sometime.
It doesn't take long to get to Bumfuk.
Okay, I'll think about it.
Louis, do you mind if I restyle you just a little?
You think this is too plain?
Not at all. You have great style!
But Hong Kong's Louis Koo doesn't have such good taste.
Go back to your mother!
Do you shit with your mouth and think with your ass?
You asshole! Watch your speed!
Where were we?
Dress more like Louis Koo.
Well, you decide.
Just don't make me look like a mute donkey.
What do you mean?
A dumb ass.
Louis Koo must be a dumb ass.
It's Louis Koo!
Damn! The chicks here all have big tits!
It's better if you don't talk.
Hello, everyone, I'm Bumfuk Louis Koo.
Hello, Mr. Auyeung.
Let go of my nuts, asshole! What's wrong with you?
You're screwing my wife!
When did I ever screw your wife?
You will, in a bit!
You're the one who hired him to screw Snowy-baby!
-So? -If you can't take it, call it off.
But her wish will be unfulfilled if he doesn't screw her.
That's right. Now let go of my nuts!
I don't want to! You're screwing my wife!
I'll pay you double for your trouble.
No problem then, grab my nuts!
Grab my tits, too, if you want.
Ayah, I'm exhausted.
You pay double, right?
Don't talk. You'll be exposed as soon as you open your mouth.
I know, "just act like Louis Koo."
Give me a demo.
Like this?
What's wrong?
This reminds me of a crawling piss.
What?
It's "creep-pee."
Move!
Snowy-baby, look who I brought you.
Is she possessed?
She's just high from the morphine.
When she's high, she recites Shakespeare.
This isn't normal. She's scary.
Take her hand.
Take her hand!
Look, Louis Koo is here!
It's him, Louis.
Just follow her.
The river's flowing, time is passing
Once it runs out
We've got to, have to, ought to break up
Are you Louis Koo?
It's him all right.
Louis Koo, French kiss me.
Not a chance!
To hell with it!
My Snowy-baby!
I was deeply moved.
I'm so screwed.
Now the girls will mark me as the lowest Hindu caste.
What's that?
Untouchable.
Does it burn?
CHINESE MEDICINE PRACTITIONER DR. ZHI VAGO
Dr. Zhi.
Can you make my nipples pink with needles?
Use spray paint. It comes in all colors.
It works on whatever color nipples you have.
Why don't you visit us anymore?
I've stopped ordering chicken in Hong Kong.
How could you quit ordering?
I still order but I want good quality chickens.
Fresh and cheap.
Where do you go?
If you want quality and cheap ones, go to Japan!
The Japanese Yen has plummeted!
You're not afraid of radiation?
No emission scares me more.
I thought the Japanese didn't service foreigners.
Just like you…
they can pick and choose when business is good.
With their economy in such a mess, beggars can't be choosers!
It's the never-give-up mentality!
You take a trip to Japan with your girls,
find out how they run brothels and how women do it in Japan.
I have lots of contacts there!
Once you arrive, find Asshi Konpon.
It's 405!
Room 405, 2nd Avenue, Kabukicho. This is it.
-Excuse me! -Open the door.
Someone's here.
He's hot. Is he a pro?
I hate the Japanese the most! Don't you dare come over!
What are you doing?
How much?
Japanese men never change their hairstyles.
Wait, you're from Hong Kong!
All right! Please help us.
We're looking for this man, Asshi Konpon.
That's me, Asshi Konpon.
Konpon is his Japanese name. His real name is Gun.
Once you meet him, you'll want to call him Asshi.
We just arrived from Hong Kong.
-It's stuck! -What's wrong?
I can't open it. Why?
Stop pushing! Pull!
Got it!
What an Ass…
A mysterious black hole.
Look at the size.
This place is huge.
This place is a blowjob parlor.
Does anyone know what happens in a blowjob parlor?
What?
Blowjobs.
I see. How?
Well, we don't do it here. This side is for clients only.
Then can you show us the other side, Ass… hi?
I see, you want to check out the other side?
Of course.
I'll lead the way, then.
Good. Let's go!
Any objections?
No. Why would we?
-We're going -Yes. Chop chop!
-Hello. -Good evening.
This is cute.
This side is a working girl's heaven.
Why, do they blow customers here?
Not exactly. Customers don't come in here.
They'll enjoy the service from the other room.
Telepathic blowjobs? That takes skill.
Charge extra!
Dumb ass! The customer first picks a girl from the other side…
then sticks his dick in the hole.
The girl on this side does the rest.
You might just as well have a man blowing them behind the wall.
Right?
That's right.
BLOWJOB GOD TAKUYA
It's Takuya, the Blowjob God!
Takuya! My idol!
It took several years before they figured out I was a man.
We're your die-hard fans!
Back then, I made enough to afford sushi every day.
Life was easy.
Now that I'm famous, everyone wants to challenge me.
Boss Asshi set up this
"Marathon dick-sucking contest."
The top three contestants get freebies.
Now they all jerk off at home before they come to me.
Have you noticed how stiff my mouth is?
Sometimes, even when I order tofu, I can't take a bite.
How sad!
If men get good at it, we'll be out of jobs!
It's true. Men give the best blowjobs.
Men know what men want.
But if you're not afraid of hard work,
I can teach you for free.
For free?
For free!
If we learn from you, we'll out-blow the competition in Hong Kong!
It's a deal.
Why not do an internship?
Learn and make money at the same time.
That's the do-anything-for-money spirit of HK!
Don't you take me for a sucker.
You're good.
-Pick your hole and get to work! -Okay!
Why do the holes come in different sizes?
Because men's dicks come in
different sizes.
The bigger it is, the longer it takes, the more you charge.
A bigger hole means more money!
This is tiny.
This is still small.
Too small.
This one is mine. Yeah!
Idiot, that big hole is for bento box deliveries.
I knew Japanese dicks couldn't be that big.
Keep it up!
Everyone worked hard today.
You've worked hard.
Thank you.
You've worked hard.
Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.
Now you know this isn't easy money.
It's harder than being screwed.
Being a prostitute is even tougher than I imagined.
Japanese dicks are so small.
I had to work extra hard! We should charge more!
That's right!
Since it's so tough, want to switch to something else?
It's called "20 second subway grope."
Once lights go out,
everything is up for grabs for 20 seconds, it's that simple.
Sometimes clients are forgetful,
they leave lots of expensive souvenirs behind.
No luck today, only a Casio and a Seiko.
Better than nothing.
Twenty seconds a pop, that's two pops every minute!
That's right, 120 per hour.
If I work nine hours a day,
that's 1,000 pops a day.
We'll earn a few 100,000 a month.
You're nuts, I don't get it.
Twenty seconds a pop, 60 seconds per minute.
Why not do three pops per minute?
That's 180 pops per hour!
Why just work only eight hours a day?
I can work round the clock 24/7! Look!
I can sleep. They grope.
I'm not awake!
What about bathroom breaks?
I can shit as I work, you see.
You earn a lot more doing 6,000 pops a day!
Wait till you try it.
How do you do?
So you're a "doctor"?
Not a veterinarian, I hope.
Feel good?
It feels good.
One thousand yen extra.
More!
Extra…
Good evening.
How do you do?
What a stink!
What's your problem?
No deal…
Grope me!
Sure
I'm Japan's top dentist! Show me your teeth!
My hand is caught!
-I'm not happy! -Japanese pig!
Relax, it'll be over in a flash.
Bring it on!
You have cavities.
Damn! This is worse than the blowjob parlor!
What's wrong?
-I'm stuck! -One, two, three!
Where's my money?
Thanks for groping me.
How much is there?
Thank you.
Thanks a lot.
I've been in Japan a long time.
No one ever accepted my invitation.
You worked hard.
Homesick?
Did you like it?
I'm glad I could help.
As long as you're happy.
One more.
Madam Kam, count me in.
I have a cold, I can't smell a thing.
Count me in, too!
When I grew up in the village, I even ate shit.
It's all right. Just pay me more.
Deal!
I've never had a foursome before. Come.
Ew, it really stinks.
Fine! Let's make it a foursome, boss!
We can handle worse!
I'll go first!
It sure smells.
Worse than shit.
What a stink!
My God.
Comfy, boss?
It really stinks.
Girls, don't quit!
Boss.
You smell good.
You cleared my nasal passage.
Madam Kam, you all right?
Joey Ma!
Kam!
Joey Ma! Give me a kiss first!
My turn!
Aren't they bouncy?
What's up?
When you were a gigolo, women drooled over you.
They queued up to bang you every day.
We still have a queue now.
You still play "duck"?
-Papa! -Madam!
But ducks make more money now!
My boys are different.
They have it down here and up here.
But I only like it down there.
I'll take care of that.
Papa Joey?
You don't know the rules.
Looloo.
This boy is fun. Chat with him.
I'm sorry.
I don't speak Hindi or Urdu.
We can't talk.
My Cantonese is probably better than yours.
We speak the same dialect!
We speak the same dialect…
my ass!
Speak for yourself!
He talked back to me.
Then hit him!
He told me to hit you!
I dare you, jerk!
Don't call me "jerk"!
I'll smash your head in…
Hey.
This is how we entertain here.
Don't call me "jerk"!
Venting frustrations. I see!
Good. Hit me!
I can take lots of beatings, I was in the SWAT team.
But I visited prostitutes…
No one wants to hear your sob stories. Get lost!
You… Only perverts wear sunglasses in the dark!
Tell your ten worst secrets.
If you can't, you two French kiss!
I'm handsome. I'm a billionaire, I think.
And third?
Um… I love you very much!
You love me? You two French kiss!
Keep it up!
This is fun!
What are you looking at?
Your legs.
What's so special about them?
I can't resist, they're so chunky.
Shut up, asshole!
Hear me out.
No matter how chunky your legs are…
I love you just the same.
Take me away with you.
Huh? You mean to a motel?
My price is…
Looloo…
Why aren't you playing?
I'm confused! We're spending our hard-earned money
venting on men?
If I need to vent, I just punch the air. Look!
It works just fine!
If you earn lots but don't spend, you won't be happy.
I can't help it, it's my nature.
Whenever I see people paying lots of money,
and I'm saving them up, it gives me the high!
So don't force me to change.
If I change, I won't be myself anymore.
When I can't be myself, I'm unhappy.
You're right!
But I'm paying tonight.
Really?
You should've said so sooner!
Joey, get me another date. I want to have fun!
Hins, off you go.
Sorry, man! Thank you!
Loo, we have a star who takes any beating.
Any beating at all?
I'm King Duck Mikey!
What?
Don't you hate me inside and out?
You want to smash a bottle over my head, don't you?
Happy?
It's just a prop!
It's fake!
Use a real bottle!
But you can't smash a real bottle on your head.
It's fake in movies.
I'll show you.
The bottle won't break, but my head will!
Come on!
Don't take it so seriously.
Sorry, don't take it so seriously.
That's why he's Duck King.
He can take worse! Mikey!
More!
If you drink all 36 cans without throwing up,
I'll give you a ten grand bonus.
Just one more!
Don't quit! You can do it!
Come on!
More!
Pay more!
Keep it up!
I did it!
What about down here?
I wet my pants!
I still have more!
Hats off to you!
If you're lost at work And forget how to love
Please look out the window and think of me
If you lose your money
You'll be very sorry
Just be yourself.
What happened to your Mandarin accent?
I'd do anything to make money…
except losing myself.
Please look out the window and think of me
My every heartbeat
Will find its way to you
The love of my life
My true self is reserved for the one I love.
Give me a drink!
Where were you?
Trying to get Mikey back here.
He wants to take the money and run! Not so easy!
I had to change my pants.
So touching.
Thank you!
Your birthday is next month!
You still remember?
Gordon gets out of prison that day.
NEW YEAR'S EVE, 1996
Fai Bro, no more bitching, just drink!
Who's bitching?
I was bored to death in Canada every day!
Coming back here is so much fun!
Bro, we're "taxmen"!
We're powerless outside our jurisdiction!
Bro, stay here with us.
Witness the arrival of a new era in Hong Kong!
Bravo!
Are you all right?
Gordon! Was that you?
Whoever threw up is the bitch!
It wasn't me.
Brother Gordon, feeling better? Have some tea.
What's your name?
I'm Kam, Boobie Kam.
I see. Where did you get these?
A lucky draw.
You're quite lucky.
Yes!
Kam.
If you ever run into trouble, just call me!
Let me massage your temples. Oops!
I, Gordon, am not a weakling.
Big Brother is Superman.
What're you doing?
Hands off my boss!
Kam, listen.
If you attack me again,
I'm afraid you won't walk out alive.
He dumped me!
He dumped you because he's stupid!
Everyone!
If no one wants Kam,
I, Brother Gordon, will take her!
Wow, Brother Gordon is so good to you. Kam, you are so lucky.
Give her some tea!
Kam.
You've gotten hotter.
Have I?
You know how much I missed you?
But my name wasn't on your visitors list.
I didn't want you to see me being weak.
I really missed you! Whenever I think of you,
I get an erection.
For real?
For real.
I've got your favorite pair of tinted glasses.
Jackie is waiting.
Let's go.
Club Bboss is now a shopping mall.
Neighborhood used to be packed at night.
Now it's only busy in the daytime.
Lots of people shop here. Look at the long queues.
What?
Can you tell me how to get to Club Bboss?
What did you say?
Club Bboss?
Brother, do I know you?
It's just ahead.
Thank you.
Let's get baby formula next…
Jackie Boy!
Big Brother! Long time no see.
I couldn't come because of work.
Time for retribution!
We're in public!
Does the boss need a permit to beat people now?
No.
Big Brother, I was working.
Boss!
What now?
Go over there first.
What are you doing?
-Let's talk-- -About what?
Quick, Jackie Boy.
Let off some steam.
What's going on? Get up!
Nowadays, lots of people upload footage on the Internet,
YouTube or Facebook, you know…
-Everyone sees it. -We'll be caught…
Enough!
What do you do now?
A tour guide?
It's just temporary. Now that you're out, we're back in business!
Kam! Wait for me at Hung Boy's tavern tonight.
Who's that?
Baby-faced Hung.
Never heard of him.
I'll WhatsApp you!
Take Boss for a drive in my car. I have to get back to work.
-Let's talk tonight? -All right.
We'll talk tonight!
He's nuts, right?
Let's keep shopping.
Beware of nutcases. Let's go.
Ever since you decided to go away
No one knows how bad I feel
I'm not in the mood for parties
Don't want to ask after friends
Ever since you left and didn't come back
Nothing is the same anymore
No reason for me to get up early
No pillows to rest my head
Now that you're gone
My only joy in life is lost
Hong Kong is no longer part of my world
Pretend I'm traveling overseas
The sun may set, but my spirits rise
To brothels where there's no hotties
To brothels where there's only mummies
Kam.
Back then, I fought my way out of Tuen Mun,
moving down Castle Peak Road.
I conquered Yau Oi, Sam Shing, Cafeteria Beach, Gold Coast,
Siu Lam, Sham Tseng, Ting Kau, Tsuen Wan…
Why didn't you take Tuen Mun Road? It's faster.
Sham Sui Po, Mongkok, Yau Ma Tei, Tsim Sha Tsui,
and Tsim Tung.
My territory spread across the harbor to Wan Chai, Causeway Bay,
and eventually Lan Kwai Fong!
In those days…
everyone knew Brother Gordon.
People still know you, Boss.
If no one wants Kam, I, Gordon Bro, will take her!
I wouldn't cry if I could laugh
Wouldn't be lonely if I found my soulmate
Pity that I've never met her
How could a wanderer like me Get close to anyone?
Bravo!
Your turn?
-I wouldn't cry… -If I could laugh
Wouldn't be lonely if I found my soulmate
Pity that I never met her How could a wanderer like me
-Ever find… -Love?
-You said love is… -A trap
That you can't bear
Tonight I'll hit the road again
No need to love me anymore
Big Bro.
I thought you sold it.
Never!
I'd rather sell my ass than your watch.
This watch is worth half a million now.
I'm taking this watch with me to my grave!
Jackie Boy, I'm out.
It's time to reclaim Tsim Tung, my old turf!
Then can you manage a few blocks for me?
Sure! We juniors know only one thing.
If Big Brother is good, we're good.
Good!
We'll do well.
Call Godfather now,
see what jobs he has for me.
Godfather. William So?
The pop singer? How's he doing?
His "Your Somebody" was amazing…
Enough! Hush!
Our Godfather, Brother Fly, is handsome!
He's way out of your league.
Just call him. Let's drink!
-Who? -He died.
Your dancing can give me a hard-on.
What's up with you two?
My phone keeps vibrating.
I just called Godfather. Perhaps he WhatsApped you?
Read it out loud for your Big Brother.
He said, "Gather 100 men at Tsim Tung tomorrow."
Tomorrow, Big Bro will show you how to kick ass!
Can't you put some clothes on?
You're making me hot.
Jackie Boy, what have you got me here? I need men!
The number you dialed is unavailable at this time…
Brother Gordon!
Why are you here?
Jackie's tied up. I dropped by to see if I can help you.
I'd be damned if you can! Get lost!
Maybe I can! Put away the knife!
We're buying G-Dragon's concert tickets to scalp!
-G-what? -G-Dragon, one of Korea's hottest singers!
People queue up for a Korean concert?
He's not Andy Lau!
We want Andy Lau, too!
One hundred center court seats, how much?
That's all? I'll take 20 more.
Center court, okay?
The world has changed!
I can make 50 grand with a hundred G-Dragon tickets.
I bet more than that on a horse race!
But G-Dragon is the coolest!
Your style went out of fashion, Brother Gordon.
This is now…
Follow me.
You're hard again.
It's my phone.
You have a WhatsApp message.
Godfather keeps "watapping" me all day.
How does it work?
I'll show you.
To WhatsApp me, find my name first.
Select "Kam," then send me a message.
Write with your finger.
Why waste time writing when I can call you directly?
You don't want to write? Then press the mic.
"Hi, Kam!" let go and it's sent.
Why waste time recording when I can call you directly?
The world has changed.
People don't want to converse.
They don't want an answer back, they don't want to listen.
They prefer talking to themselves.
Like what you're doing now?
Yes! Hi, Kam…
Then I get the message. You try.
You still have an unopened message from Godfather.
How do I open it?
Try it yourself.
Press the green button.
-Then what? -Press again to enter.
Right.
It's Godfather all right!
He says,
"Gordon, a real job tomorrow, a meaningful one this time."
"The Chief Executive will visit a district."
"Take some brothers with you and heckle him off the stage!"
Good!
Kam, Hong Kong still needs us!
Kam.
I haven't forgotten the half million you lent me for my legal bills.
I'll pay you back with interest as soon as possible!
I know you will.
I love Hong Kong! Support the government!
I WANT STABILITY BUILD HONG KONG
Fight real estate!
Housing for everyone!
Fight real estate hegemony!
Stop baby formula trafficking! Safeguard supplies!
Oppose the government!
Oppose…
Support the government!
Why are you over there?
Support the government!
What are you opposing? Who do you think you are?
I'm a supporter.
I belong to the supporters!
Come over and support… our side.
Support us to oppose…
Are you against me? You're confusing me!
Support…
Time for retribution! Step outside!
Step outside!
Let's go. I have to punish you!
Why are you here?
If you don't stay on your side, you won't get paid!
I don't want it!
-I want it! -Let's go!
Sir, I'm still in…
You were against me?
Boss, it's all fake. It's just a show!
They paid us to play a part!
What are we doing?
What happened to the world?
A lot has changed.
You can't turn back the clock. If you want to survive,
just follow the tide!
You mean be like you and peddle baby formula?
Better still, become an extra and pretend to protest!
It's just a job, Boss! Don't take it so seriously!
Otherwise, you're screwed!
It's not how we did things in the old days!
We knew right from wrong.
-The past is… -Shut up and listen!
I refused to work as a valet in Tsim Tung.
When Godfather asked me why, I said, "It's beneath me!"
So Godfather eventually offered the valet job to you, right?
Why bother? No one remembers those things!
No one remembers Tsim Tung Brother Gordon.
Tsim Tung Brother Cream? Maybe.
I don't care! Your Big Brother
wants to reclaim Tsim Tung to restore his honor!
Are you… with me?
You haven't been my Big Brother for a long time.
I…
Smart guys only know one Big Brother,
it's called "money."
Wake up, Big Brother.
The world has changed
We have changed
No idol can shine forever
No applause is everlasting
The world has changed
Brother Gordon, what happened to you?
Don't ask, let's just go.
-Where? -Just go!
For a midnight snack? What's wrong?
We don't belong in Hong Kong anymore!
Then where do we belong?
Hong Kong is doomed!
At least you can still work and make money!
I'm a Big Brother! Not some lousy errand boy!
I want to rebuild Bboss!
Are you with me?
Of course, you have my undying support
forever.
Good! Kam.
I owe you half a million.
With interest, it comes to at least $2.5 million.
I'll repay you $2.5 million!
Now lend me another $1.5 million.
When I make it back, I'll pay you five million.
Okay?
Brother Gordon.
That's my retirement fund.
Reopening Bboss takes a lot of money.
Nowadays, no one knows about Bboss anymore.
Okay, I'll just call Brother Fly.
He said he'd back me…
once I got out of prison!
I just need to get a hold of him.
Here we go.
It's ringing.
BROTHER GORDON
Brother Fly died years ago.
Silly girl!
Why didn't you just tell me from the start?
Because I wanted to show you
how the world has changed!
We queue up, scalp concert tickets…
that's how we make a living.
I got it.
I, Gordon, owe you half a million.
I'll pay you back.
FROM GORDON I FINALLY LEARNED HOW TO USE WHATSAPP!
Half a million?
How did he get half a million?
Kam, they say Gordon has gotten friendly with Drug Dealer Ken.
He's smuggling heroin. He's leaving by boat at dawn.
He'll get himself killed!
He'll die!
If no one wants Kam,
I, Brother Gordon, will take her!
Step on it, driver!
I, Gordon, swear
I won't let my woman work the streets!
Brother Gordon!
Why are you dressed like this? Go home!
Jackie said you work with Drug Dealer Ken!
You're dead if you get caught!
Dealer Ken is just an old friend!
What are you smuggling?
Ken only smuggles baby formula now!
Where are you going now?
I'm immigrating!
Where?
Slovenia!
Slo-what?
You're so dumb.
Slovenia is a signatory of the Schengen Agreement.
I'll get a Slovenian passport in a few years,
then I'll go to Spain, Italy, France…
What will you do in France?
Conquer Chinatown!
Then bring you over to live the good life with me!
Are you done? Set sail!
Brother Gordon!
Go now. Take care!
Go home.
Brother Gordon!
-Bye bye. -Brother Gordon!
Where's your Rolex?
That old thing is only worth 700 grand or so.
No point in keeping it.
The past is past. I know that now.
But I'm a Big Brother! I have my honor to maintain!
Lose at one table, I take my chances at the next!
Kam.
You were the only one there for me
when I got out of prison.
You deserve Brother Gordon's love.
But Brother Gordon…
no longer exists!
Even if the whole world forgets you,
you'll always be my Brother Gordon!
You can win back everything that you've lost!
I don't have any chips left.
Look, I'm Wonder Woman!
We can partner up and revive Tsim Tung!
Kam!
You're right, we belong here.
If we can make it, we make it here!
Kam.
We're partners from now on.
Whatever you say, Big Brother.
The sun may set, but my spirits rise
Fake northerners are no surprise
Their boobs sag as soon as they undress
As we help each other fight We can travel far
If we're steadfast The future is ours
Dry your tears
Climb over mountains See beyond the stars
Setbacks force us to fight Like waves in the sea
Hope carries us forward To the beacon of light
This spray-tanned singer really sucks. How much is he?
-Ten grand. -What?
That's what he pays us.
He just wants an audience. He's a big kingpin in Bumfuk!
Madam Kam! He's…
Brother Gordon!
How do you do?
Handsome stranger, come perform more often.
I will. I had a great time today.
I'll pay you triple.
-Thanks. -Let me sing two more.
Please do!
Let's sing a duet, "No Return to Sword Mountain"?
-Yeah! -You first, sing like Roman Tam!
Roman Tam?
Despite my many skills
That's not the song!
-And you sang horribly. Let me do it. -Sure.
No return to Bumfuk
Courage overcomes
-He's good! -Isn't he?
-Miss Kam! -Good morning!
When did you arrive?
Sensei Takuya-san.
He's Brother Gordon.
I'm in Hong Kong to judge the "Blow Like Takuya Contest."
I read that this place has good food.
I want to try the geoduck sandwich!
Can't understand a word he said.
Geoduck… Yum!
We've got a big one over there!
I can't wait!
Go on!
Mr. Auyeung! How come you're alone?
I'm not alone, my wife is somewhere…
-Here she is. Allow me to introduce her. -Sure.
This is my wife, Rihanna.
Kam, you have quite the collection of friends.
It's true.
What about that sucker over there?
It's Professor Chan!
Did you have plastic surgery?
-Recognize me? -You look much better now!
Professor Chan. Gordon.
Today's me surpassed the me of yesterday.
Today I'm Legislator Che Chan.
My slogan is,
"Speak for the People When the Government Won't Listen."
I know you're good with numbers. But political activist?
I did the math! A legislator's salary is 80 grand a month.
I go to meetings just to create chaos by throwing things.
They kick me out within five minutes.
The effort-to-return ratio is amazing!
Brother!
You make a lot of sense.
What do you think of our restaurant?
Kam, you're paying over 100 grand a month for rent,
plus renovation, overheads and wages.
But you're selling cheap fast food?
You'll only clear 300 grand, tops.
But you also have to support this… brother.
It's doesn't make sense economically.
Brother! That's where you're wrong!
Where did you find this guy?
Big Brother, give me some face.
Take him inside first.
Kam? You've also changed?
Get up!
Get in there!
How did you come up with such an idea?
You turned the exploitation of women
into a lucrative, respectable partnership!
Enjoy!
Look, business is thriving. Double or nothing!
Let's open a chain. I can pay you back sooner.
No hurry.
Money isn't everything.
What matters is that Big Brother has respect.
Look, they've all come for you.
Kam,
it's because of your charm and integrity.
They're all your friends.
No.
Big Brother.
Dear brother!
It's Godfather.
Hush! It's Chinese New Year. No sadness!
It's really him.
That's the Godfather.
Brother Gordon!
Godfather!
Kam.
The day you ran away with your somebody
Brother Gordon, that's out.
Then what's in?
This one…
The sun may set, but my spirits rise
Night falls But there's no fear in my eyes
Hope will be renewed at first light
As we help each other fight We can travel far
If we have faith, the future is ours
Dry your tears, climb over mountains
See beyond the stars
The sun may set, but my spirits rise
Night falls But there's no fear in my eyes
Hope will be renewed at first light
As we help each other fight We can travel far
If we have faith, the future is ours
Dry your tears, climb over mountains
See beyond the stars
Setbacks force us to fight Like waves in the sea
Hope carries us forward To the beacon of light
Setbacks force us to fight Like waves in the sea
Hope carries us forward To the beacon of light
A client specifically asked for me. Who bestowed this honor?
The Chief Executive has spoken!
Even you call me that, no wonder I feel so stressed lately.
Help me relax?
Help the Chief Executive? Yes!
You must run for the Chief Executive office!
No!
You must do it! I even thought of slogans.
"If Andy Lau runs Hong Kong, he'll give us endless treat."
"No need to flee Hong Kong with Andy as our Chief."
You be the judge.
Can this man be our Chief Executive?