I've been looking for you.
I'm busy. I'm working with the IMF.
But it's urgent.
It's always urgent with you.
What?
The Prince of Asturias, Girona and Viana, Duke of Montblanc and Lord of Balaguer
arrives tomorrow on an official visit.
All at once?
No. This is one person.
He is also King Felipe VI of Spain.
During lunch
you must make a good impression.
Great.
-We will bond over soccer. -Which type?
Regular soccer.
If he is a king, he is a fan of Real Madrid - the royal club.
I'll joke about Messi and Barcelona, he'll be ecstatic.
I'm afraid that won't be enough.
The royal dynasty is famous for winemaking.
Felipe will bring a couple of bottles from his family's cellar.
-It will have to be tasted. -Wonderful!
My job is finally bringing me satisfaction.
Mr Viktorovich, this won't be a binge.
Wine etiquette is an art form unto itself.
You must distinguish between Cabernet Sauvignon and Pinot Noir.
-Chenin Blanc and Chardonnay. -Okay!
But I can't right now, the president needs me.
This evening, I'll find a place
with a good wine selection.
Okay.
I'll specify the time and place later.
Okay, Oksana!
PRESIDENTIAL ADMINISTRATION OF UKRAINE
Mom, what are your flowers doing in my room?
I don't...
We relaxed too soon.
The president has sent 80,000 potential pensioners back to work.
Let us recall:
the retirement age hike was an International Monetary Fund requirement
for Ukraine to receive money.
President Goloborodko sided with Western partners.
IMF chief Helga Rasmussen provided a commentary on the situation.
I am pleased with the trip.
President Goloborodko gave his assurance
that our demands will be met in the near future.
I am wondering who reeks of alcohol here?
Lawmakers made changes...
Our Judas woke up.
...to raise the age.
I was against the measure.
Late yesterday, the president called me.
PRIME MINISTER
We had a long discussion.
Vasyl Petrovych persistently asked us
to meet the IMF's demands.
We reluctantly...
accommodated him.
I repeat, reluctantly.
As reported...
The head doctor called mom.
It's back to the grindstone and arbeiten.
Good job, Vasya!
You gave mom the gift she needed!
I thought it wouldn't affect her.
You thought?
You weren't elected to think, but to govern!
...our nation will do in the near future.
Masha, I'm downstairs.
-What should we wait for? -Mom.
NEWS
Mom, don't...
Don't take offense, Mom.
I simply thought that...
we'd get a deferral.
Please understand...
Mom, listen.
As a son, I'm very ashamed.
But as president, I had no choice.
As a mother, I understand you.
Thank you.
As a pensioner...
I have no other choice.
It doesn't hurt. It's alright.
I'm feeling queasy.
Be quiet!
Shape up!
-Your coffee. -Thanks.
-What is this? -Your order.
Four espressos in one cup.
-What are you doing? -Trust me.
It's a proven hangover cure.
Disgusting.
I'm not drinking that!
Really?
You didn't say that yesterday.
Take it!
The only thing I need to do today is to recall what I did yesterday.
-You don't remember anything? -Nothing.
Wow!
I remember!
You were going to secure a deferral.
-I was half way there, buddy! -So?
The broad was alright too.
-The first foreigner to laugh at my jokes. -Well?
After the third shot, you deprived me of powers.
How?
Like this.
Shut your mouth. Got it? You bald diplomat!
Shut your bald mouth and nose!
Your bald teeth...You diplomat--
How embarrassing.
You think?
-You got off to a good start. -Really?
You veered the talks in the right direction.
You said Ukraine and Sweden are two congenial,
kindred nations.
You spoke of the historical roots of our relations.
Well that's fine.
Fine you say?
I'm a president with an engine!
Swedes...
My sweeties.
You, Swedes, are awesome.
You founded everything for us.
You established our capital.
Your... that Kaiger.
I mean Kyi, Lybid founded...
-Did we ever thank you? -Sure.
At the Battle of Poltava?
-We sure did thank you. -Poltava?
We're friends! Our flags are identical!
Yours is blue and yellow, ours is yellow and blue.
Identical.
Swedes...
Sergei, look who I brought.
Sweden!
How uncultured!
That reminds me,
you spoke of the cultural ties between our two nations.
-I did? -Sure.
Let's go!
Thanks! Pour a third shot, please.
Swedish babes...
None for you? You don't respect me.
Who do you have? ABBA?
ABABA-BA-BA, right?
All you have is ABBA, and we have Cossacks!
To Europe!
With a mustache...
Viktor Pavlik shaven.
Do you know the Belonozhko couple?
They're great!
What is it?
What dances we have! Let's go dance.
We have Cossack dancing with garters.
Vasya is awesome!
Do it, Vasya!
Camera on, Sergei!
Come on! Get dancing, people.
Let's go! Where do I sing?
Where do I sing?
Together now, people. Come on, don't be shy!
No, I didn't love the right one
Come over here!
I didn't say the right words
Come over, come on.
No, I didn't watch for the right one
I didn't warm her with my heat
No, the night blinded us
Onto the dance floor!
Dance with me, you.
No, I didn't pray to the right one
Love stole the night
No, I didn't love the right one
I didn't say the right words
No, I didn't watch for her
I didn't warm her with my heat
No, the night blinded us
Together now!
Come on.
No, I didn't pray to the right one
This is a scandal!
How can it be?
You don't think so?
It's an international scandal.
It's as well the dance saved you.
There was a dance as well?
And now...
synchronized swimming.
This is the end.
No, this is the beginning.
-Yelling, "My little Swede-- -Not so loud.
My little Swedish babe.
I give you this pool of champagne!"
You made everyone drink water from it.
Mr President!
Wait, please.
Cancel the press conference.
Cancel it? Why?
I'm nauseous. I beg you.
You have the right complexion for it.
With your sickly appearance
you'll show how hard the choice was.
Why did I call Yuriy Ivanovich?
What's done is done.
You'll never play the part this way again.
Sergei, please. Why can't we...
"Your language pleasantly surprises."
Why is Matilda sending me messages?
It means it all worked out.
How? What worked out?
When you failed to fish Helga out of the pool,
you took Matilda.
You shoved her in a cab, yelling,
"To the hotel, boss!"
Then you disappeared.
How...
"I hope tomorrow is still on."
It worked out twice.
Why didn't you stop me?
When? I was preoccupied!
I was rescuing Helga out of the pool!
Give me the phone!
What were we doing there, Sergei?
-Wait. Let's cancel it. -Vasya!
Please sit and don't move.
Enter!
Come in.
Leave the rings around his eyes, he must look haggard.
Why?
Vasya...
Because you don't sleep.
I don't.
-You think. -I didn't think.
You look for solutions.
I didn't.
Why did I call Yuriy Ivanovich?
Accepting IMF conditions was the only right thing to do.
Now you're suffering, but you meet the conditions.
Can I suffer and not meet them?
No, you cannot. Let's go, Vasya!
-Gosh. -The nation is waiting.
Sit.
Give me that bottle!
The top.
Truly. It's like I have a spinning top in my head.
-The top! -Oh, the cap. Here.
Flip the folder! Lord!
-Shape up! -Okay.
-Camera ready? -Yes.
Put it away.
No, don't!
Shoot!
Dear Ukrainians...
it's very bad...
for all of us.
For you and me.
Vasya!
Shape up!
But we...
We believe that...
soon, in a little time, it will be better.
Vasya, stick to the script.
Open the folder!
We are Ukrainians.
We are brave.
Strong.
Free.
We shall...
endurance it.
Endure it.
Endurance it.
Vasya,
en-du-re.
En-du-re.
Super. One more take.
I've no idea how this could happen.
A high-security facility where gold is stored!
No security cameras, no mobile reception.
No normal doors. What the hell is this?
-But we-- -Don't make excuses!
Listen! Exactly!
Take care of this, got it?
Olya Yurievna, we...
We will handle it.
Dmitriy Vasilievich, there's an emergency button inside
that opens the door.
I know.
I know, Andrei. And you know this.
But...
she doesn't need to know.
Yes, we'll start with red.
Sergei Viktorovich,
wine tasting is composed of three stages.
The first: visual perusal.
Lift the glass.
Put it down!
No need to yell.
I get it, no left hand.
Use whichever hand. But take it by the stem.
Your hand shouldn't heat the wine.
Raise the glass to your eyes and tilt it slightly.
Look at the light, color and hue. What do you see?
Wine is like wine.
Good wine should shine in the light,
and there shouldn't be carbon dioxide bubbles on the top.
Second stage:
orthonasal olfaction.
Come again?
Aromatic valuation.
Raise the glass.
And inhale.
What do you smell?
What should I smell?
Good wine shouldn't smell of sulfur and yeast.
Next, do a few circular motions
around the axis of the glass.
We are enriching our wine with oxygen.
Now, its true aroma should reveal itself.
Do you smell the scent?
Sure, yes.
Finally, the third stage:
gustation.
-About time! -Stop!
Don't hurry!
First, you slightly moisten your upper lip.
Take a sip, then chew the wine
and swirl it in your mouth.
Then, open your lips
and gently let air into your mouth
with a light slurping.
I'll demonstrate.
Do it again!
You swallowed before you slurped.
That's how you did it,
so I swallowed!
Felipe hates gaffes.
Keep it in your mouth, inhale, slurp and then swallow.
I'll show you again.
Practice on rosé.
Vasyl Petrovych.
Right...
Sorry, Bella Rudolfovna.
I was reading the new land code.
I took a short nap.
You have a meeting with the head of the Motor Sich plant.
It's about locally made helicopters.
Right.
Helicopters are just what I need.
Maybe we could...
I've rescheduled.
Really? Thanks.
Here.
-Drink it. -What is it?
It will help you.
It's a secret that Yeltsin's aide shared with me.
Drink it and go home.
I'll reschedule the rest.
Thanks a million.
Sorry, I didn't know this would happen.
It's okay.
You did it for the good of the country.
You are justified.
Thanks.
Oh, Lord...
By the way, last year
Felipe didn't seal a contract with Nigeria's president
because he wanted to drink red wine with ice.
Do you taste it?
It's like the wine
blossoms in the mouth.
This is called "the peacock's tail effect".
It is truly a science.
It would be easier if he brewed moonshine.
You've reminded me.
Felipe VI doesn't just make wine.
He might bring a few bottles of brandy.
Alcoholic.
Put it down!
Now what's wrong?
Brandy is the opposite.
It likes the warmth of your hand.
Gosh. What if my hand is cold?
Drink with small sips.
Maybe we shouldn't mix drinks, Oksana?
Sergei Viktorovich, berry to berry.
Are you sure?
Everything is under control.
Some coffee?
What am I doing here, Sergei Viktorovich?
Why the formality of "Sergei Viktorovich"?
Yesterday, you didn't.
-Really? -Really.
Tiger cub.
Moor.
My unbridled attaché.
My inviolable consul.
Lord.
You also called me that.
No...
How did this happen?
How? In all kind of ways, Oksana.
Like this and like that.
Oh my God, how embarrassing.
Why embarrassing?
I've seen much in my life,
but what you were doing was...
No. Don't say anything.
I wonder, did they teach you that at the diplomatic academy?
Teach me what?
I'm not going to list everything.
I'll just say, it didn't follow protocol.
Lord.
My career...
is over.
My God, oh no!
Why is it over, Oksana?
Many people start their careers this way.
Why are you crying?
Stop crying. I could take offense, after all.
Is sleeping with me really that embarrassing?
No.
Why are you crying?
Because I didn't expect
my first sexual experience to be this way.
At 35 years old?
I'm 27.
Relax, nothing happened.
Nothing?
No, you fell asleep in the taxi.
Why am I at your place then?
Where should I have taken you?
I asked for your address.
The only thing I heard was...
"Fe-fe-fo-fa fe-teen."
Sechenova, 15.
Well, I'm sorry.
Sergei Viktorovich...
what is my dress doing there?
It's drying.
Yesterday you...
you soiled it.
Oh, Oksana.
So,
Sergei Viktorovich.
You and me.
Nothing happened yesterday?
Oksana, the only desire I had yesterday was to kill you.
Thank God.
On the whole...
this isn't...
decent.
You could have said what happened and not joke.
It was low and mean.
Why mean all of sudden?
This is my,
so-called, retribution.
Can I demand compensation for moral harm
for bringing you wash basins all night?
What time is it?
A ministry meeting in one hour.
I forgot, what is the king's favorite wine?
Right, gentlemen.
Goloborodko amazed me.
To conduct such unpopular reforms,
that is...
Well done.
He is digging his own grave.
Take notice, gentlemen. He's doing it without any dirt on him.
True.
Please, don't move. I'm drawing.
Why are you drawing?
Go ahead and paint!
It's so the birthday boy likes it.
Viktor Fyodorovich likes paintings.
He doesn't get them.
But he likes them.
Incidentally,
at this rate, Goloborodko will soon join Viktor in Rostov-on-Don.
That's as clear as day!
All we have to do is nudge him.
That we know how to do.
Yuriy, shalom!
We have a small, yet important, errand for you.
Translated by Mark P. Raczkiewycz